Hello my friend, I do hope that you are well & that you are able to have a smile on your lips. How has your week started off like so far? Is it the usual running around like a headless chicken or it is more of a go-slow kind of day where everything seems to be in place? Anyway, you shall be good, I have this ka-feeling (or may be it is just my wishful thinking) that this is going to be a more favorable week to you.
Now then, let us see what we can achieve in today’s session (don’t worry this is not going to be a teaching class) or what do you think? Let me start off by this, what is a prison? As per the Merriam-Webster dictionary – prison has been defined as a state of confinement or captivity. Also defined as a place of confinement especially for law breakers. Well, if I do guess correctly, my assumption would be that we are more familiar with the second one rather than the first.
If I may ask you a personal question, you don’t have to blurt out loud the answer. What do you think of yourself? Is my question confusing or do you want me to expound further to make it more palatable? Okay, so what I am asking you is this, how do you see yourself before others & does it matter to you what others think of you? In other words, does the thoughts of others matter more than what you think of yourself?
As I said this is personal question, you have the choice of how you want to answer it. Whether it is by way of self-examination or writing it down or saying it out loud or just ignoring what I have just said, that is all up to you. Do you ever feel like the world is controlling how you look, behave, talk, where you live, who you hang out with, what you eat & so forth?
When we grow up, we are taught most of the things that we know but then through our journey we learn there is more to life than we assumed. We live our lives based on how we were brought up & then along the way we choose the path which we see as befitting of us. I will take a wild unfounded guess that there are times that you have at times had self-doubt to the extent you that you have felt that you are unworthy.
You sit there & wonder to yourself, am I really capable of doing this or am I able to climb up the ranks or am I able to compete in this sports that I love or am I able to be good enough for him/her just to name a few thoughts. As a human being we have the privilege of achieving fits that may seem impossible to other creatures. All this can be done by going out of our comfort zone.
We are beings created to exceed beyond the normal but we shackle ourselves to what it is that others think of us. You think am lying, let me ask you, when you woke up in the morning getting dressed to go to your hustle did you not even for a second wonder, is the cloth am putting on going to create a statement to my peers when I walk by or you just left & said to yourself my clothes my choice.
Let me go even further, in your pursuit of acquiring a car have you not even consider how would my friends see me when am cruising in such or such a ride. Or it was more like how I usually say, as long as it is a car that can move me from point A to point B & has what I require the rest does not matter.
Let us still go further when you are dating or in a relationship, do you make it you make it your mission statement, “he has to be tall, dark like chocolate, ripped & handsome or she has to be curvy like the African calabash with the beauty of Venus & skin smooth like silk”. When we reduce ourselves to what the world around us sees, is it based on our own benefit or more so for the world’s benefit.
It is unfortunate that at times, we can be handcuffed to how the world or society sees us that our actions, thoughts are not ours but what has been forcefully chugged down our throat. You are made a believer of a specific school of thought that to sway you to another ideology or having an open mind is an uphill task.
Don’t fret, you are normal & it is nothing out of the ordinary but just part of your journey of self-discovery. It is when you take time to stand still for once in your life that you realize that you don’t have to go with the flow of the current. We have a default setting of rushing whichever direction the wind blows without a second thought questioning ourselves like wait a minute, “Where am I going? What is in store for me along this path? What is the game plan? Why am I here?”.
A good number of us, inclusive of myself have had such instances where you try to fit in & to do so you cloaked yourself in what pleases the world & the society. I want you to take a moment & look at your life & examine if it is the one that you had envisioned or is that which was orchestrated for you without your consent being sort.
When we allow ourselves whether willing or not to have our lives molded for us, we don’t get to make it to be what it was meant to be under our own free will. It is all up to you to escape from your confinement, take that leap of faith & see if you are meant for more.
We live in so much fear that we are comfortable with the what if train of thought. What if they don’t like me, what if they feel threatened by my actions, what if I can’t sustain myself or my family, what if I am not good enough, what if she/he is not attracted to me, what if I fail? This can be quite an impediment to your growth & the realization of what is in store for you other than your current situation.
It is now the time to rise up, take arms & pack your bags of worry, self-doubt, fear, uncertainty, insecurity & set it on fire. Let the flames engulf all of them & as you let the fire burn molding you in the shape of your full potential & rise up like the phoenix. Step out of that comfort zone of what others view you as being & embrace the unknown with the belief of being the best of you & shade the skin of fear of what others think of you.
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